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Relationship Coaching

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What is a Relationship?
Buddhist mythology uses various metaphors to emphasize the uniqueness of a couple's relationship. One metaphor likens the couple to a bird with two wings; the two wings work together to enable the bird to fly high and reach faraway destinations. Another metaphor likens man and woman to the mythical Hiyohu bird (said to live in Japan), which has one body and two heads.  Both mouths of the fish nourish the same body.
The Buddhist conception of relationship is a partnership whose success depends on the ability of husband and wife to give this to this world their full creative value as individual human beings. By means of their united resolve to create a wonderfully harmonious and progressive unit of society, based on the solid rock of mutual respect, they draw out of each other  the three "poisons" of  anger, greed and stupidity. The great test of a relationship (beyond its natural function) is to what extent it enables each partner to develop and achieve self realization, based on their personal values. A good  and lasting relationship is built upon mature love between the partners - loving each person, as they are, a unique self with virtues and failings, where each partner still works to develop the qualities they lack. A good and lasting relationship can give us stimulating company, a fulfilling sexual relationship, a healthy happy family and make us very happy. Buddhist philosophy likens the closeness of the two partners to the body and its shadow, flowers and their fruit,or roots and leaves.

What is Relationship Coaching?
The basic idea of relationship coaching is to lead a person to find a suitable relationship, or to discover a new kind of intimacy and love within an existing relationship
.The aim of relationship coaching is to add a new dimension of mutual gratification of needs based on parnership, giving and receiving, which will strengthen the bonds of love and mutual respect. Relationship coaching deals mainly with the objectives of the partnership, the unique contribution of each partner to the relationship pattern, and to solving problems in reality. Relationship coaching focuses on two key success factors in relationships: making the right choice and doing the right things.

The Main Questions Asked in Coaching:
* What kind of relationship is most suitable?
* What is the main contribution of this relationship apart from setting up a family?
* How can this contribution be realized in the best way possible?
Every relationship is unique: in its needs , in its objectives and in the right way to achieve them.

The Seven Achievements of the process of Relationship Coaching:
1. Finding a suitable partner - for those who haven't found one, and building a new relationship.
2. Solving problems in the reality of the lives of the couple
3.Locating new and significant areas of interest.
4. Building together a new suitable relationship model and realizing it .
5. Building together a path for personal advancement and realizing it.
6. Creating a permanent pattern of trust based on thinking and doing tpgether.
7. Creating new love within the relationship.

In Dr Reuven Katz's book "One or a couple", he discusses the four main goals of a relationship:  
* Preserving and renewing love
* Functioning smoothly
* Setting up a family  and ensuring contunual quality of life within the family
* Actively supporting and encouraging the self-realization of each of the partners.
Daisaku ikeda, a current-day philosopher, writes"If you are neglecting things you should be doing, forgetting your purpose in life because of the relationship you're in, then you are on the wrong path. A healthy relationship is one in which two people encourage each other to reach their respective goals while sharing each other's hopes and dreams. A relationship should be a source of inspiration, invigoration and hope."
Antoine de Saint-Exupery wrote (in the book "the Little Prince"):
Love does not consist of two people gazing at each other, but in looking outward together in the same direction."

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